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Posts tagged with 'lolpolitics'
First smut of the New Year
Sooooo I wrote a little somethin’ for Shousetsu Bang*Bang.
Okay, it’s 20K words of little somethin’. My first two-parter ever! And it’s…
It’s, uh… oh God.
Obligatory warnings: contains guys doin’ it. Not safe for young people or my mom. Any resemblance to real people is purely coincidentaaaaaafuckit
Also, it contains v. pretty pictures by haitoku@lj.
If you like, please read the rest of the issue and show the authors some love.
And here, have some author’s notes:
Who’s surprised? Yeah, me neither
Prop. 8 supporters, before the election: Oh no, we’re not going to mess with existing marriages, they can stay married, it’s cool.
After the election: Ahahahah no j/k, screw you, we’re going to scream and cry like two-year-olds until all your marriages get annulled.
“Stay Classy” doesn’t even begin to cover this.
Seriously, I’m pretty sure if you look up “douchenozzle” in the dictionary, you will see a picture of Sen. Saxby Chambliss (R-GA).
As someone who once served in the military that this distinguished gentleman seems to have made it his life’s mission to fuck over, please understand my inability to articulate just how much his cowardice and outright unabashed contempt for men and women in uniform pisses me off.
Mr. Chambliss, on behalf of myself and every man and woman who has ever served in this country’s armed forces, fuck your knee and fuck you.
CHAOBELL FOR SENATE: WILL KICK SEN. CHAMBLISS IN THE JUNK FOR YOU.
(okay, I swear I’m putting the Internet down and going back to work now)
Oh no you did NOT
A group of people who want to bring back the days when women stayed home and had babies and, if not married, were afraid to have sex ever have not one goddamned iota of business crying “OMG SEXIST” when someone says something is like “putting lipstick on a pig.”
No, you great bloody hypocrites. No. Absolutely fucking well no. That is not okay. You do not get to do that. You do not get to treat women the way you have and then go BAWWW over “lipstick on a pig.” HE DIDN’T EVEN CALL PALIN THE DAMN PIG, DID YOU FUCKERS EVEN LISTEN TO THE SPEECH OR DID YOU JUST PICK AND CHOOSE THE BITS THAT–wait, these are Republicans we’re talking about. They don’t see anything wrong with picking and choosing bits of the Bible that back up their stupid shit and ignoring the rest, why wouldn’t they do the same to their opponent’s speeches? Silly question.
Dear Ike: I would like to make you a business proposition. I will sacrifice one young goat of your choosing if you will leave us alone here and follow the McCain campaign around for a few months. No fatalities, no major property damage, just keep it down to a mild tropical storm and rain on his speeches and blow stuff around and annoy the hell out of him. That’d be awesome. Please e-mail if this is acceptable to you. Or wrap a note around a tree branch and blow it onto my patio if e-mail isn’t good for you.
I’m Tarquin Fin-tim-lin-bin-whin-bim-lim-bus-stop-F’tang-F’tang-Olé-Biscuitbarrel, and I approve this message.
*runs like hell*

